Love Lost and Found in St. Louis

From time to time we like to dip in to the ole Missed Connections section in St. Louis’ own Craigslist. Why? Because these things are crazy stupid. Like KSDK airing a show about Cardinals highlights Thursday night during prime-time stupid.

Denny’s South county (southcounty)

Attractive blonde sitting with I assume was her husband, couldnt keep from looking at you, very sexy.

Nothing like spending your dinner trying to avoid eye-contact from the creepy guy a few tables away that clearly never did get the hint to make Denny’s somehow suck even more.

my sexy big buck – w4m – 38 (always wet)

miss u already, wanted to spend the nite. sorry couldnt handle what i truly wanted from tonite. thx 4 tryn prob sum things unfixable, ruff def the trigger tonite. want u to make love to me tomorrow plz

Wow. Gross. Anyone have any freaking idea what “ruff def the trigger tonite.” is supposed to mean? Anyone want to draw us a picture? Also, if you were wondering, the town of “always wet” isn’t Chesterfield, its a reference to her vagina…or rather that sarlacc pit she pretends still resembles a human vagina.

send me a email satan – w4m

I miss you!

Crap. This one’s for us. Excuse us. …Look, we’re getting through our inbox as fast as we can. We’ll get back to you soon Matt Chambers.