St. Louisan Makes the Very First Ford Escort Truck

Driving down Forest Park Parkway, the “intra-city 40”, and a truck pulls in ahead of us.

Seems small though. Can’t figure out what’s wrong with this thing, but something is off. Wait a minute…that’s a Ford Escort…that is a Ford Escort truck!  …which aren’t supposed to exist and thus are like a chick with a third boob. You know, like at first you hear about it and you are like “Whoa! Three boobs?! That sounds awesome…and then you get there and after looking at it, its not quite right and makes everything look off because they aren’t lined up horizontally, but the third one is aligned vertically with the right boob making her look like some sort of weird dog girl which isn’t what you were hoping.  …maybe if there were four and she was evened out…no, even then, its just wrong and your dreams and expectations tempered like so many Saved by the Bell-themed wet dreams after watching Showgirls.

Have you ever really needed a truck but only had an old 4-door car? Lets say you did. Now let me ask you this: In that situation, would you think to yourself “Well I’ve got a shit-load of time on my hands! Lets just make a truck out of my Ford Escort!”

No. You wouldn’t think that. This guy did though. Thought it. Did it. …and now he is legend.

More photos after the jump!