Guy Clumsily Out Smarts Dumbass Thieves

KSDK is reporting both on their site and on the air that a Jefferson County man outsmarted his home intruder. The guy got away, so I guess this is kinda true…but, we think the word “outsmarted” might be overstating things a little.  Judge for yourself.

One of [the] victims they say thought fast to protect his home and future wife.

When 26 year old Nick Barr got up for a drink of water just before 1 a.m. Tuesday, he flipped on the light and saw a stranger in his home holding a rifle.

“He just said, ‘don’t move,’ were the only words he said,” says Barr. “Soon as he said that it was like telling me to run. I just bolted immediately.”

And he was thinking fast, too. Barr says he switched off the lights, shut the bedroom door behind him and yelled the first thing that came to mind.

“I was yelling at him and told him I had a gun and a phone,” said Barr who was trying to protect himself and his fiancé.

“I couldn’t just stay still and do what he said you know, because that would leave her defenseless so I had to do something,” said Barr who when asked if he did in fact have a gun said, “Not that I could reach. But you got to do something so that’s what I told him.”

When we think of someone that “outsmarted” a burglar, we think along the lines of diving behind the couch, assembling a gun with his slipper, a pencil and a rubber band…maybe even just doing the old bugs bunny trick of saying “You want my money.” over and over again until switching to “You don’t want my money.” at the last second. He’d be all like “Crap. Got me!” and then just leave and go get a smoothie or something. Maybe an anvil would fall on his head, not sure how that one ends exactly.  Either way, locking yourself in a closet and saying “I have a gun!” doesn’t exactly register with us on our “outsmarted” scale. Isn’t the move to just shoot the door if you are the bad guy?  That’s the answer. We would have also accepted “Take a bunch shit since the guy did you the favor of locking himself in a room.”

You know what the real story is here? This guy looks just like Ryan Dunn from MTV’s old Jackass show:

via KSDK