The Eureka Days Inn is Really Really Really Dirty

If you are from Eureka, consider yourself lucky, the chances of you needing to stay in your local Days Inn is pretty slim. Feel bad though for the family that comes in to town to visit Six Flags and say “Hey, a Days Inn, those are usually pretty nice.”

Not this one.

The Eureka Day’s Inn isn’t just bad though, its been voted the second dirtiest hotel in the country!  The second worst in the country!  Think about that.  Think about all the nasty freaking hotels there have to be out there…all but one are better than the Day’s Inn in Eureka.

“If hell had a hotel it would be something like this,” one visitor wrote. “The worst, nastiest hotel I have ever stayed in, in my life. Dirty towels, dirty room. Rude manager. Run from this place as fast as you can!”

Heritage Marina Hotel in San Francisco was named the dirtiest hotel in the nation after guests complained of bed bugs, TripAdvisor said.

“TripAdvisor’s dirtiest hotels list reveals that unfortunately, some hotels take the notion of offering dirt cheap rooms far too literally,” said Christine Petersen, chief marketing officer for TripAdvisor, in a statement. “Our candid traveler reviews prepare future guests for grimy lodgings that might otherwise be an unwelcome surprise.”

We hear a man recently permanently damaged his retinas when he turned on a black light in room 103B.

This whole thing reminds me of a joke.

A family walks in to a talent agency and says to the agent, “We’d like to show you our act.”  The agent curtly replies, “We don’t do family acts.” but after the instance of the family, the agent says “Ok, fine.  You have 5 minutes.”

The family quickly gets ready.  First, the father does a quick tap dance while his son positions himself beneath him on his back. Suddenly dad drops his pants and takes a dump directly in to the open mouth of his son.  It doesn’t take long before the poop is spilling all over the floor.  As the son tries not to choke, the dad takes the son’s pants off and begins to jack him off in to his own face.  On the other side of the room the mother has taken off her pants and the daughter has begun to try and stuff the family’s young baby back in to the mother’s gaping vagina.  After getting the the baby in up to her head, the family dog then begins to go to town on the daughter while she drags out a car battery and clamps the contacts to her nipples.  Suddenly, the whole family stops and says “This is our impression of Haiti” and then the all proceed to shake and fall down on the ground while the dad goes around kicking each of his family members and looting their belongings all while yelling “Aftershock! Aftershock!”  Then they all jump up and yell “Ta da!”

The slack-jawed agent can only stammer out “What do you call that act?!” to which the father replies “A night at the Day’s Inn Eureka!”