Deadspin posted a few lovely stories about our big fat basketball coach at St. Louis University, but one just stood out. Here’s an excerpt (emphasis mine):
“Rick was always a jerk to the managers. Every season he went out of his ways to never learn their names. They were only referred to as ‘manager’. One day, Rick was drawing up a scout in our team room about 2 hours before tipoff. Things were going well, considering he was fully dressed and we hadn’t been referred to as cunts yet. From the white board he started yelling ‘manager, manager, bring a towel over here!’.
“Not knowing what to expect, we sat back eagerly awaiting his next move. What happened next still haunts me to this day. Majerus took the towel, pulled his pants down, and quickly took a dump into the towel, which he was holding under his ass. After he was done he used part of the towel to wipe, wrapped it up, and HANDED IT BACK TO THE MANAGER, and told him to throw it away. The kid looked like a deer in giant Rick Majerus headlights. The whole room was silent. Rick just pulled his pants up and went back to the scout, never once mentioning it or acting like anything out of the ordinary had occurred.”
Dude drops a duce in a towel in the middle of a team meeting? How does one even think to do that? This guy is like the complete embodiment of South Park’s Cartman.