Halloween is only a few days away and if you are like most people, not only do you not have a costume yet, but I just reminded you of that and you went “Crap!” and now everyone around you at work thinks you screwed something important up or got fired via email and really want to ask you “What?” but are worried that you might drag them in to the problem if they do.
Anyway its cool duderson! We have some ideas!
First off we should say that these ideas are really just for the fellas. Why? Because girls have it easy on Halloween! You’re choices this year, as they are every year, are as follows:
1. Sexy Kitty (Give yourself black eye and be a punched kitty!)
2. Sexy Superhero
3. Sexy Playboy Bunny
4. Sexy Devil
5. Sexy School girl
That’s settled. Now for the guys:
1. Dave Duncan
This is an easy one. Get a grey wig or that grey hair spray, throw on a jersey (bonus points if you actually have a Duncan jersey) and then bitch all night about how everyone hates you and your son just because he can’t hit a ball if his life depended on it. Also, if you see a guy dressed as Anthony Reyes, kick him in the balls.
Wear all black, put soot on your face and hold the burn edge of an old baseball card all night.
3. The Rams
Just don’t show up to the party.
4. John Abule
Any ole zombie costume will do just fine for this.
5. Mayor Slay
Spend tons of money to make sure you win the costume contest even though the people you are running against have no chance anyway, and then when you when, take the costume off and don’t really do much until the next costume.
So there you go, super easy costumes with a St. Louis vibe!
Be sure to send in photos of you in these or any other costume when you are out this halloween, and that goes double for the ladies. In fact, send photos of you in your sexy kitty costume and we’ll pick the best one to be in our header for a while!
You guys: “What a great idea you just had.”
Me: “Thanks, I know.”